Beautiful, Not Broken
By Cyndi Woods
Growing up with something that set me apart from everyone else was difficult at best. I always felt on the sidelines of everything going on around me. I got into a lot of fights in middle school because I didn’t have a handle on my circumstances. All it took was for someone to make one comment and my temper was fueled.
I couldn’t do all the things everyone else was doing and that made me feel… broken. I always felt like that one toy in the toy box that all the kids threw aside because it was broken. I fell into a place of anger and frustration on many different occasions. I sat in the principal’s office a few times after a quarrel with another student and the kids who were always in there sat on the other side of the room from me, not wanting to catch what I had; or so I told myself.
You may be wondering by now what it is I have? Well… I’m blind.
Back in those days of middle school, my sight was not like it is now, but I was diagnosed with an eye disease that would continue to rob me of my sight. Right now I only have ten percent of my sight. I don’t know if I’ll lose more or not. Unfortunately this is the type of condition that doesn’t really have many guarantees.
It would be very easy for me to be bitter and angry about my situation and allow myself all manner of sinful actions and claim they are justified. Truth be told… I’ve been in that place. Believing I wasn’t worth anything because, well… who has value for something that is broken? Some of you may be feeling that same way. Dear lovely and beautiful friend, may I share a verse with you that has revolutionized my self value and worth?
John 9:3 says “Jesus answered, ‘It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him.’”
This is from a circumstance in which the people with Jesus were questioning who sinned and now the punishment for that sin was this man who had been born blind. They figured it was a direct result of bad choices in either his life or his parents. I’ve sometimes felt like I was being punished for something and now I must carry the weight of blindness. Now I must tell you that I didn’t grow up a Christian. I came to the Lord in my twenties. I knew nothing of this verse before then. But I only took hold of the gravity of this verse last year! Twenty years after finding God.
While reading it again for probably the millionth time, the words leaped off the page? “… so that God’s work might be displayed in him.” God chose me to carry the weight of blindness so that HIS work could be displayed. Could you imagine Leonardo DaVinci asking you to hang the Mona Lisa on your wall for others to see and admire? Of all the walls in all the museums in the whole world, he wants to hang his most prized master piece in YOUR room!
My sweet lovely friend, I learned that I’m not broken, I’m the wall that God wants to hang His master piece on… and so are you! If you feel damaged or without value due to a disability, I pray you find comfort in knowing that God has hand selected you so that His might and power can be on display for all to see. Make no mistake, He will never force His love and mercy on anyone, but He is waiting for you to hand Him the nail and hammer and give Him permission to work in your life. Permission to let His work be displayed in you.
